Comment Wall

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                                              Skyline of Seoul. Source: Seoul Skyline

Comments

  1. Hi! I just read your story about creation and Adam and Eve. I liked how you decided to change how the story was worded, so that your audience could understand it better. I wonder what it would've been like from a certain person's perspective from the entire story. I couldn't really tell if the story was narrated by God or a narrator. I also liked how you included why you chose the image on your story. It does a great job of explaining what the story is about.

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  2. I like how you got into the mind of God in this! I like reading from that perspective. However, what if you used that perspective to go deeper into the reasons why God created the forbidden tree? It's still somewhat confusing as to why an unconditionally loving God would get angry at his creation for doing something that he caused. This gives you your chance to outline those reasons in a creative manner. Nice set up overall though!

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  3. Hi Peter! Your portfolio looks great! I especially enjoyed the story of Adam and Eve from God's perspective. It was interesting to get into his head and understand His passions. Great job taking a biblical story and translating it to a more pedestrian point of view so the audience could really grasp what you wanted to portray. Overall, I think you have done a great job so far!

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  4. Hi Peter.

    I think I read your biblical story on your blog and I still like it! I think Genesis is my favorite book of the bible to read - I find it fascinating that this story is how many Christians perceive the world as starting. I really enjoy your writing and the details you use. Have you thought about fixing the name of your story for the link on your page instead of 'story 1'? Other than that - I think your website looks really good! Your pictures are fun. I like how they really capture the attention of the reader. Great job!

    Danielle

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  5. Hey Peter! I really enjoyed reading your portfolio this week. It looks really good so far! I thought the perspective you chose was interesting and creative. The story was overall easy to follow and flowed smoothly. I agree with Ethan that this would be a good platform to expand on why God would lash out on his creature in the manner he did, so maybe expand on that? Overall, your stories are well-organized and easy to read.

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  6. Hey Peter!
    I read your story about Sindbad and am very curious of it. I also read the Sindbad reading and your added details to the story certainly make him more relate-able to us now. I think the take on his spoiled past is not unresearched as he does show many tendencies that illuminate his carefree nature. One aspect I would argue with you upon is the addition of the line "he lived happily ever after." Sindbad seems to be a character that always finds trouble.

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  7. Hey Peter! I read the story "Creation and Fall". I also want to notify you that your label at the top of your blog reads "story1". I think that that might be accidental. Anyways, I really enjoyed your rendition of the story oHey Peter! I read the story "Creation and Fall". I also want to notify you that your label at the top of your blog reads "story1". I think that that might be accidental. Anyways, I really enjoyed your rendition of the story of Adam and Eve. It was very simple and easy to understand. It was basically a storytelling of the Creation, since in the Bible, there's not too much narrative going on. f Adam and Eve. It was very simple and easy to understand.

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  8. Hi Peter! A little head up, your menu link to story 1 does not have the story name there but rather just "Story 1" written, not sure if that is intentional or not as your other story has the title but not "story 2." Your adaptation of the creation story is really sweet and what I believe would be a great way to introduce a child to the teachings of the bible. The way that you portray God as a very loving father makes the story very personal and adorable.

    - Anna Margret

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  9. Hey Peter! I loved your version of Adam and Eve, there are so many different ways to explain that story and still get the same meaning across. I liked the little tidbits about how God chose the names Adam and Eve, since I never felt like it was really explained how we ended up with those names. I also liked how you made Sindbad much more tame in his story instead of leaving him as the brash, brazen character that he usually appears to be. It was a nice change of pace that we see him as a more cautious individual. I was very shocked by Captain Cadabra's attempt to kill Sindbad though, since Sindbad was only trying to help him expand his business and increase profits. What would he have done if the Sumatran gods hadn't healed Sindbad? Would he have felt the same level of remorse? Overall, great stories so far, I can't wait to see what other ones you add!

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  10. Hey Peter. I just read your Sinbad story and really liked it. I like the fact that you included the past of Sinbad in the story as well to show why he was the way he was. It explains a lot and it is pretty sad the way life had treated him but I guess he didn't value life before his parents passed as well. He completely changed and wanted to do the exact same thing in his life that his parents did which is a very noble thing. It was sad that the captain also tried to poison him because his life had been hard enough but for the one person that he trusted also tried to kill him so I feel like that put a toll on him. In the end however he found the love of his life and now travels back and forth from his home to hers which is a perfect ending.

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  11. Hi Peter,
    I just got finished reading your Sinbad story! You did a really great job of describing your characters and their backgrounds. I had never read the original story so I stopped at the beginning of your story to read your author's note to gain more knowledge about your version of the story. I really liked how you decided to make those various changes throughout your version of the story. Your story took a lot twists and turns which made it more interesting for your readers. You had a good mix of dialogue in your story with all of your characters. It was also nice how your story had a pretty happy ending. Great job!

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  12. Hi, Peter! First off, I have to say that I really like the layout and the overall look of your website. I think you have made it very aesthetically pleasing and it is also very easy to navigate, which I really appreciate. For all of your stories, I made sure to read the author's note first, just so I could give myself a little idea of what I was about to read and also so I could compare it to the original version of the story. I really like your writing style and I think it is very unique and fun to read. I think you have done a great job with the flow of your stories, and you have a great mix of storytelling and dialog in all of them, which is really helpful in understanding the characters emotions. Overall, I think you have done a wonderful job with your project so far, and I think you will do great in finishing out this class!

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  13. Hey Peter. I just read your story Unnatural Uncle and really enjoyed it. I like the fact that you made the young boy be very forgiving even when his uncle would try to kill him. It shows how mature he is for his age and understands why things are the way they are. He understands why his mother would treat him like a girl and why everyone needed to believe he was a girl as well. I think another topic you could write about is why the Uncle doesn't like other boys being born. It could make for an interesting story because while I was reading it I kept on thinking why the uncle wanted all the boys killed when they were born. Also I really like the picture you used in this story because it seems very original and also makes me think how serious of a story it is even before I read it.

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